my lovely has been on spring break, off in modesto making clothes, and driving the car--which she doesn't do much here. I've been busing/walking to and fro the workplace--until today. This morning was beautiful...sunny, billowing clouds, a perfect Santa Cruz morning. It wooed me.

It lured me.

It promised me I would be fine.

So I rolled up my pant legs, put on my trusty ole helmet and set off on my bicycle.

I used to ride 20+ miles a day...for years. My brain still knows all of my old riding strategies, shifting, traffic, cadence. But my 33 year old computer nerd body wasn't buying it. Taking the first couple of gentle rolling streets was fine...I actually did really good considering i've ridden Once in the last 4 years or so. Then....the hill. not the long gentle slop of broadway...but the big dip and big hill of Soquel towards highway 1.

I didn't stand up, I down shifted and pedaled and pedaled. I made it to the top but right past Pottery world....so close to my office...just blocks further...my vision started going tunnelish.

Set the bike down. Took backpack off. Took Helmet off. Breathe. Stars. Breathe. Blackness. Breathe, my legs are shaking. I see a cement bench in between the pottery parking lot and a gas station. I stumble towards it thinking..."if i just lay here, in this parking lot, people will get worried. I'll go lay on that bench, and they will just think i'm having a zen moment.

i made it to the bench and promptly passed out. Zen!

Light came back a minute later, and I lay there for another 15 minutes. Before stumbling into the gas station mini mart for gatorade, savior liquid.

On the way home I did the hill again, slightly different the other way but still a good hill...[soquel and capitola rd.]...passed 3 people walking their bikes--smart people. Made it to the top again and rested for a while before continuing carefully. Now i'm at home, sitting here at the computer because i think my legs are too wobbly to stand. Day one. I'm going to get that damn hill....either that or take a bus to the top and bike the rest of the way.